🐟Osprey Drops Fish on Power Line, Sparks Fire, Becomes Slacktivist Folk Hero

Dispatches from the Slacktivist Rebellion

In British Columbia, a hungry osprey dropped a fish onto a power line, sparking a brush fire and knocking out electricity. Locals used 4,800 gallons of water to extinguish the blaze. The osprey? Unbothered. Possibly trying to cook its catch.

Ashcroft Fire Rescue posted: “Another suspicion could be that it’s tired of raw fish and wanted to give cooked a try.” Slacktivists now refer to the bird as Comrade Crispy, patron saint of chaotic resistance.

“Sometimes the revolution is a bird with bad aim.”

Closing Transmission

The system is fragile.

The fish are flammable.

And the news?

Not necessarily.